The Best of Alternative L.A. roundup in the L.A. Alternative Press decrees that the "best alternative to weapons of mass destruction" is a Pink’s double bacon Polish burger:

It hits you hard and it hits you strong.

Sure, it seemed like a good idea while you were waiting in line at Pink’s for over an hour as drivers along La Brea smirk at the long wait. As you wind your way through the line, the smells hit you: sizzling bacon, fat burger patties and slowly cooked polish sausages. Hell, it probably takes all of your will not to request the grease-laden chili be smothered in there as well.

Meat (burger), meat (polish sausage) and meat (bacon), all stuffed in bun. Never has the apocalypse tasted so delicious. If you’re truly diplomatic, you’ll convince your significant other to order up a burger as well: mutually assured destruction at its best.

Lesley Barger also gives tips for crashing the pools at security apartment complexes.