Pat wants Jared dead

Ripped from the headlines at Dateline Hollywood, TV evangelist Pat Robertson has called for another well-known figure who annoys him to be assassinated. That would be Jared the Subway Guy: "How many more times do we have to see this man hold up a pair of his old, fat-ass jeans? We get it. You lost weight. Stop annoying us. If Jared thinks we’re trying to assassinate him, I think that we really ought to go ahead and do it."

This just in: Dateline Hollywood also breaks the news that Fox host Greta Van Susteren has "gone missing" on her 91st day of covering the Natalee Holloway disappearance in Aruba. Fox News isn't covering the story, says DH, but not because their host isn’t young and pretty enough to generate ratings. Network executives claim her disappearance “simply isn’t newsworthy.” Dateline Hollywood creators Ben Fritz, of Variety and the former Spinsanity website, and Gil Cunha were the subject of an LAT web watch item over the weekend. "We were confident there was a market for a publication that's essentially The Onion meets Entertainment Weekly," Fritz says.

[Stupid me typed Deadline Hollywood instead of Dateline Hollywood the first time around. Sorry guys...]