Welcome to the tour, where you'll get the real dirt on housing in this region.
We don't need to tell you: real estate is sexy around here
Even the weeds are special.
But Cold Property has something for everyone. You like to pay way too much for stuff? No problem.
Sure it might hurt a little.
Tired of those deadly dull neighborhoods? There's action afoot here!
You want to discourage visitors. Easy.
Speaking of no-frills places.Cold Property can show you a unique one-room dwelling that won't attract many solicitors.
On another property, a bit further inland, we remind you to read the directions carefully.
Let alone take a step.
There's only a small chance that you will be trampled by wandering cabinets.
And we have some interesting fixtures. Hey! You said no-frills.
The appearance of some rooms may surprise you a bit. But that's part of the fun!
One word of caution: Please don't disturb the owners, even those who live in their cars.
Oh, and by the way, if you're not ready to buy yet we have other tantalizing possibilities for you.
Steve Harvey can be reached at email@example.com. His Twitter address is @sharvey9.