Stuff that drives bosses crazy

Chronicling the bad behavior of people in positions of authority is old hat, but what about the not-so-hapless souls who work for them? Fortune's Stanley Bing finds the rank-and-file to be almost as infuriating (though they're not paid nearly enough to command equal billing with the big boys). Here are three of his top six gripes:

--We don't listen. You, the boss, tell a guy to do something. He nods like a bobble-head doll. He goes off, comes back in a couple of hours with a sack of potatoes, and puts it on your desk. "What's this?" you ask. "I asked for the numbers on second-quarter pacing." He looks at you dubiously. "I was sure you asked for a mound of potatoes," he says. You kick him out, close the door and wonder whether life is worth living. You decide it's not.

--We show up late. It's 7 A.M. You have to put the quarterly report on the wire in half an hour, and you've instructed your entire staff to be in at 6:45. Everybody is there ... except Nat, the guy in charge of formatting and printing the information, which must be on the chairman's desk for his review by 7:15. Where the frig is Nat? By 7:12, you are pacing up and down the hallway, smoke coming out of your nose. At 7:21, with the chairman barking for his biscuits, Nat rushes in, face flushed. His dog got sick or something. You have a choice. You can (a) scream at him until your head flies off your neck, or (b) sit in your office and eat what's left of your own stomach while Nat does his thing. You do (b), then later (a). And everybody thinks you're a meanie.

--We leave. You spend years cultivating your staff. You give your time and soul to develop us and groom us, you treat us like golden children, give us money and stock options and platinum credit cards ... and then one day we come into the office and tell you we are going. It doesn't matter where. We are departing and leaving you alone, hanging out, even possibly responsible for doing the work yourself.