Yes, I'm serious. I think. Celebrity chef Mario Batali has a problem with American H2O, which is why he's creating his own mineral water composite, based on a chemical analysis of l'acqua italiana. The water in Italy apparently makes pizza taste better than in the U.S. Posting in Wired, Joe Brown says Batali plans to use his specially formulated water at L.A.'s impossibly popular Pizzeria Mozza (he co-owns the place with Nancy Silverton and Joe Bastianich). Is he really serious? More important, how much will this jack up the bill? "Water is huge. It's probably one of California's biggest problems with pizza," Batali says. Chris Loss of the Culinary Institute of America says nearly every chemical reaction that produces flavor occurs in water, "so, naturally, the minerals and chemicals in it will affect every aspect of the way something tastes." NY tap water has always been considered the secret ingredient behind the city's exceptional pizza (and bagels), though it's apparently far different from what's found in Italy.