Hey, thanks. More than 75 caption ideas came in for the photo of Mayor Villaraigosa and Paris Hilton visiting at a Grammy party. Some cutlines were wittier than others, some cleaner, some rude and crude, but all caught the gravitas of the media moment when Los Angeles' two biggest camera hounds came smile to smile. An impromptu board of advisers liked one caption best — "Sleazy media whore, and Paris Hilton, at the Grammys" — but as maximum editor I get final cut. So with apologies to David Letterman, here's a Top Ten in the mayor's voice and a Top Ten from the Hilton perspective. Anonymity is probably a virtue here, so you winners know who you are.
#9 - "Yeah, they call me Hizzoner, but what the hell."
#8 - "Wait 'til Gavin Newsom sees this picture."
#7 - "What a coincidence! I'm not wearing underwear either!"
#6 - "I would really like to introduce you to my wife....I'm sure she would love to meet you."
#5 - "Have you ever thought of running for Los Angeles School Board?"
#4 - "This is way better than having that damn [Steve] Lopez all over me."
#3 - "Really, Paris. I am married. And, umm, I think you need to move your hand. A little to the… umm… right. Other right. Right… there."
#2 - "Make no mistake: that's hot."
#1 - "Si, se puede!"
#9 - "Ever since I was a little girl, I've dreamed of dating someone named Fernando."
(Mayor replies: "And ever since I was a little boy, I've dreamed of staying in a Hilton.")
#8 - "I like your ears, they are cute and cuddly like Dumbo."
#7 - "You're so adorable! You look just like my little Chihuahua!
(Mayor: "Well, as a matter of fact, I have a little bald-headed dog too. Would you like to meet him?")
#6 - "So, um, can you introduce me to Gavin Newsom?"
#5 - "Are you SURE there's nothing on the Ethics Commission? That Boyarsky dude rocks my world."
#4 - "My dad used to take us to Villa Ragosa when we where kids. Did you work there?"
#3 - "You're married to Melanie Griffith, right? That's hot."
#2 - "Is that the LAUSD plan in your pocket or are you just happy to see me?"
#1 - "Hi. I'm Paris. Who are you?"
More after the jump, along with a photo of the mayor's Grammy date snuggling up with Tinkerbell's mistress. Plus at Native Intelligence: The mayor tells LAO's Jacob Soboroff what he and Paris were really talking about.
Los Angeles Mayor Antonio Villaraigosa outlines his ideas for "Simple Life: Skid Row" to series star Paris Hilton.
Now we know what the Mayor was dreaming of during the State of the Union!
Mayor Villaraigosa explains to Paris Hilton that “Mayor” is, in fact, a title and not his first name.
"I love Paris in the spring time, I love Paris in the fall...I love Paris in the summer when it sizzles, I love Paris in the winter..."
"I see we both use the same spray-on tan."
"Phew! For a minute, I thought you were my campaign manager's wife."
"Take that, Obama!"
The mayor's date: Antonio Jr., Villaraigosa's oldest son, gets face time with Ms. Hilton at the Grammys: